Saturday, January 21, 2006

Osama Taped Bulletins Somehow Neglect Weather and Traffic

A couple more gorgeous, 50-degreee January days in the bag here and one has to long until Jupiter-style windstorms of chemical and ash scour the surface of a broiling,desolate planet?

Or you can just walk the dog and watch him watch the squirrels play. Lunch at the jobsite yesterday saw conversation turn to an examination of just this sort of choice. Are we too quick to look at the downside around here? The weather truly has been amazing this winter, but it is impossible to have a completely positive conversation about it. Every time, a reminder of the other shoe, hanging above us, ready to drop. We're in New York, so it is probably a nice loafer. The Slip-On of Damocles. We decided we really do love the city, however ridiculous it is to live in, much less practice carpentry in...

And of course, you can't live here without thinking about The Next Attack. Especially with Osama on tape again. What's up with the tapes? I can't get past the fact that certainly, at least once, an underling has had to risk death, cutting BinLaden off mid-rant to point out he actually needs to press "Play" and "Record" at the same time. I think of that and Osama getting all sheepish and pissed when he replays it the first time:
"Is that really what I sound like? Seriously? I think there's something wrong with the speed or something. How many times do I have to tell you to buy reliable brands? Now we have to buy another one, so what did we save, really? I can't send this tape out. No, it is not "fine." I sound like that guy from "Taxi". No, not him, he's the "Back to the Future" guy. The other one, the wrestling girls one. Why, do you think I sound like the crazy old one? Well, thats what you just said... Forget it. The point is-can you just shut up and trust me on this?-I can't fight the Great Satan of The West with crappy "Coby" products! Okay...I'm just saying... Fine. It's fine. Forget it. Geez...
Do we have any of those Cheetos left, the crunchy ones...?"


  1. It has been ages since anybody (including the people who make money at it) have been able to make me laugh about Osama. I tip my hat.

  2. heee! not only that you a) had this visual in your own mind but b) described it so well I am laughing at the version now occupying mine.