Oh my God there is hope: You don't even have to read the second half of this article.
Ohhhh wait...that would involve the US Government buying percentages of the banks themselves, not just buying the "assets" the banks cannot sell to anyone else, anywhere, at any price.
Oh, sorry, my mistake. That is crazy talk, obviously.
Okay, I don't have pictures of urination, but I do have this, which is, uh...
Where Krugman basically enunciates a Sweden-style plan.