Wednesday, September 17, 2008

There Has Been A Terrible Misunderstanding

You know that phrase "Your mouth is writing checks your ass can't cover"? Well, that is not a good situation. But there is a worse situation. It happens when someone thinks your mouth has written a check when clearly you weren't even in the checkout line. Your mouth was barely even comparison shopping.
It happens. I know, because it just happened to me.
Basically, because my mouth slowed down in front of the store, my ass is now the victim of identity theft.

As some of you know, I have been taking the "Foundations" course at my local Crossfit affiliate, which is a kind of gym, somewhere between a boxing gym and an old school tumbling gymnasium. "Foundations" is their pseudonym for "Extreme Beginner." In the class we learned the basic lifts they use, how to use the rings, etc. Very basic stuff. Every year, all these Crossfit affiliates raise funds for prostate cancer research by doing a specific, very intense set of exercises known as "Fight Gone Bad."
Here is an explanation and here is a video of the Austin, TX iteration of the event last year:


Boston version.
Ann Arbor.

Very intense stuff designed as a test for the very advanced. As I was leaving class, I picked up a flyer and mentioned I would be interested in "doing that." My "that" was in regard to the flyer's call for event volunteers to hold stopwatches, fetch water, etc. This was misunderstood-somewhat mischievously, I suspect-by the instructor who the next day congratulated me, publicly, for joining their event team..."It's great that someone from the beginning class would attempt this...blah, blah, blah..."

So, I am screwed. In 11 days I will be on a team of incredible athletes, all doing this ridiculous workout, and at an inevitable, horrifying point, the man or woman before me will finish and it will be my turn. I will do my best, but it will be humiliating.

The good news is that you can participate in my humiliation, and others can benefit from it. You can donate what I will call Point-and-Laugh Cash to a very good cause, write it off your taxes and know that your donation helped make it impossible for me to back out. That sounds fun, doesn't it?

Just go here: http://athletes.kintera.org/crossfit08/donwood

This isn't one of those You Must Raise "X" Thousand Dollars to Participate events, so literally, a couple bucks gets you in the Point and Laugh Club.
And who doesn't like pointing and laughing?

5 comments:

  1. Oh my. And I thought I screwed myself over agreeing to walk from SFO to NYC with Jenny Robin (she gets the craziest ideas).

    You will have my support if for no other reasons than my having agreed to things I shouldn't have, and my having a prostate. I absolutelty will not laugh, although I may point.

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  2. PS. If my sister were here, she'd offer to trip you so you wouldn't have to do it, saying "after all, you'd only end up with a broken leg."

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  3. Anonymous8:43 PM EDT

    Wow!
    How inspiring!
    Please don't doubt you'll do well.
    It seems to be a personal best contest?
    I'll skip the pointing & laughing.
    I'll find my pom-pom's!
    GoooooOOO DW!

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  4. I'm in Don. My dad passed away from prostate cancer 10 years ago so it's near and dear to my heart...just as laughing at you will be.

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  5. Anonymous12:25 PM EDT

    I like that one of the labels of this blog is fear. Just watching that video scared me. That's insanity, really.
    I wish you luck, it is a good cause. My father-in-law just beat prostate cancer this year, so...yeah, fight the bad fight.

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